The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize