Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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