Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize