Your face is a jimmy john
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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