and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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