I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
