well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
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She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
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Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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