that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
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IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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