i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Randomize
