Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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