I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'