your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
