Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize