I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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