you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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