I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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