Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
