Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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