also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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