In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I have peed in a lot of sinks
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize