The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You're a waste of cheezeits
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
