I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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