Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
And then he peed in my hair
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
