My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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