We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
it's great music for shaving your balls
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She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
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In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.