you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
