We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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