the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize