speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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