All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
