Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize