But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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