sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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