I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
