I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize