Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Everclear isn't food dammit
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
