VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
