Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
