So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize