I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
