can we get nightvision for the apartment?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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