I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize