We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
