It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
And then the night went full on bisexual.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
