My Higher Power is John Stamos
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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