My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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