there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
