Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
This house was built for laser tag.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
