I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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