My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize